Tuesday, September 20, 2011

A Skype connection is as un good as me grammar!

Italian grammar is hard! Here is a quick summary: There are 4 different tenses for any verb used with one of these words.... me, you, he or she, they, we, you (plural). So I thought German was hard.... But at least it sounds somewhat like English. Any little kid could guess what "Das ist gut" means. I don't know if it's just me but I can't stand it when my parents end up being right... I can hear my dad saying, "I told you," every time I stare at the chalk board and feel like I'm getting lost in the Italian Matrix; the chalk words slowly start turning green and start sliding down the board in incomprehensible codes. My dad was right when he said German is only useful if you're planning to go to Germany... man shoulda taken Spanish... (lets see the Italian for ...F(BEEP)ML would be...Il tuo italiano fa schifo)

I was hoping that my Skype connection would be better then my brain connection lately. Apparently they are the same. Fuzzy and the audio is crap. I talked to some good friends on Skype the other day. Said hi to one of my best friends Jake Coleman... He just had surgery and seemed to be doing good... but I wasn't sure if it was just Skype or if the Doctor decided to do some plastic surgery to his face as well, but he looked kinda like a Picasso. "Jake, I don't think your nose is supposed to be there."

I also got to talk to my boyfriend Samson. When he first came on I couldn't hear a single thing but then all of a sudden I heard what I thought he said to be, "I can't see you... Breaking up," Wait? You said what? You Couldn't tell me this before I was 1000 miles away?!?! What the?! But before I could say something to him, he said, "There now I can see you!" I realized what he meant to say was "I can't see you the image is breaking up."  Gaby came in and wanted to meet him. She turned to me and said "Dang he's cute!!!" and I replied with a nicer form of no duh! 

After talking to my boyfriend my mom skyped me. Since I now share a room with Brenda (Bruno's Girlfriend) and Maria (the mom), Jones walked in. For some reason it felt weird and then I realized... I never have boys in my room. I was talking to my mom and she said, "Wait, I hear Jones!" so I called Jones over to talk to my mom and my mom asked him, "What are you doing in Q's room?" Since he doesn't speak very much English I explained... You uomo (man) in mio (my) room (gestured to room) at mia casa (my house) no uomo in room! He laughed and said "Me, and Q go now! Night Momma!" then stood up walked over to my bed and plopped himself on it. I figured I would help freak my mom out so I said good-bye as I covered the web camera and hung up on her. My mom called me back and Jones and I were already ready to take the joke even farther (We were trying not to laugh).  When I answered my mom's call, Jones walked behind me with a towel around his waist. He moved towards my bed and you should have seen the view on the web camera!!!! It was perfect!!! The way he walked towards my bed you couldn't tell that he still had his clothes on because the image cut off from his hips up and when he took off the towel my head was in the way so all you could see was a towel being tossed on the floor. The lighting was crap which caused Jones to turn into a shadow as he sat down on my bed again! (Couldn't stop thinking about the fact that only in Italy could you find a guy siting on my bed BA WA HA HA HA HA!!) My mom went Crazy!!!! She started asking what was going on... who the guy was and what the heck I was doing... She's only been gone for a week and instantly she assumed I would start pulling a Nelly Furtado? really mom some confidence could help... She started laughing her head off when she realized a joke had been pulled on her. Her last words to Jones were, "That was funny.... but don't do anything like that or I'll go mamma grizzly on you!" Trust me mom... he's 10 years older than me.... That's a decade!!!! Ewww it'd be like dating my dad ewwww! Crap bad images.... ewwww!!! Yeah never going to use that analogy again... it's like Vegemite.... leaves a bad taste. 


  1. Q! You're so funny. I love reading this. Good job for writing with so much imagery - I feel like I'm there with you. Are you sewing everyday? You should teach classes in the summer to make $. I would totally sign up!

    Love and miss you. Ciao.

  2. Thanks Heidi!!! I'm doing a lot of flat pattern drafting and draping but my sewing class is long too! I just finished learning all about seams and I have a huge look book I have to do for that class. Sewing class! Totally ha ha ha maybe a nude drawing class to boot jk jk!! ha ha ha. I miss you too!!! Tell the Young Women hi for me!!